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You’re Not Thinking About My Pregnancy ALL THE TIME? WEEK 11

Approved by the What’s Up Moms Medical Advisory Board

Baby’s a little over 1½ inch long, so about the size of a large and nougat-y chocolate from a See’s assortment box. Bones are starting to harden. Muscles are beginning to develop. The skin is still thin and transparent but soon will begin to thicken. Perhaps most adorably, these days baby’s rockin’ a 1:1 head to body ratio. That’s a lotta dome.

Aside from all your physical symptoms — BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! — you might also be riding the wave of some pretty gnarly mood swings. “Moodiness” as a symptom can sometimes seem a little amorphous just in the sense that it’s not easily quantifiable or definable. But your ever-changing preggers bod is all the proof you need that hormones are indeed hard at work on your body (and mind), so if you’re feeling some emotional peaks and valleys these days that shiz is real.

First of all, if you’re feeling depressed, talk to your doc. As for moodiness, it helps to find some new tools for staying Zen — whether prenatal yoga, regular soaks in a bath, a daily hike, listening to a podcast, using a meditation app, whatever. Any ritual that’s calming to you that you can grab as needed. And by all means avoid situations that you know are going to make you cray, like your husband’s loooong work dinner or your nephew’s 3rd birthday party at Chuck E Cheese. You need no excuses.

Now that you’re starting to emerge from the 1st trimester fog you may finally have the energy to connect with your partner again (like soon you may be able to keep your eyes open past 9pm!). And you might be noticing a few changes in your marital dynamic, which makes sense, since you’re each experiencing this phase differently. For you, the pregnancy is probably front of mind ALL the time since it’s taken over your body. For him, the ride is not as visceral, and many soon-to-be-fathers’ excitement is more long-view. So loop him in! Bring him to some appointments. If there’s a book you’re loving right now — on pregnancy, on birthing — get it front of him. And keep in mind that many expectant fathers feel some anxiety — along with their happiness — at the new level of responsibility on the horizon; some feel an amped up pressure to provide, whether they realize it or not. Plus, your partner may just be missing you these days — his drinking buddy, his stay-up-late buddy. Awww.

So keep an open mind and heart. The pregnancy is long, and over the course of it, you two will sometimes be in lockstep, other times staggered. Which is the way it goes.