Tell Me to “Be Patient” & I’ll Punch You in the Throat WEEK 39

Approved by the What’s Up Moms Medical Advisory Board

This week baby is considered full term. Big deal!

By now you may have already given birth – if so, HUGE CONGRATULATIONS and what are you doing reading emails?? Get back to nuzzling that sweet new little creature of yours! (But not before you add your info here so you can get emails tailored to your baby’s development – we’ll stay in lockstep with you over the coming year and send you weekly content about your baby.)

If you’re still cookin’, hi! We’re still here, too!

This week your doc will measure the dilation and effacement of your cervix and compare it to last week’s measurements. This can help get you a timetable… or not. Remember to keep peeking in the toilet before you flush to see if there’s a mucus plug floating in there. When (or if) you see it you know you’re getting close and you can dance a little jig.

You’re probably getting really restless and feeling really done right about now and climbing the walls (please do not climb anything, lady). As much as you can, tie up loose ends at home and at work so you can sit down, call it a day, and veg. It can help to remind yourself that baby doesn’t actually need much at the beginning save for somewhere to sleep, feeding gear/ boobs, and a car seat. Oh and diapers. Also you’ll probably get a ton of helpful swag from the nurses at the hospital — swaddle blankets, baby shirts and mittens, first aid gear, and salves and sprays to soothe your ravaged vagina and boobs. All this is to say: if you’re ready to wrap up on the prepping front, you sure as sh*t can.

Key now is to distract yourself. A lot of women at this point start looking into ways to naturally induce labor. Truth: one of the best things you can do is walk, because it helps move baby down into your cervix and into position. Sorry, we know you don’t want to hear that right now given your size, but gravity is real! Then there are all those old wives’ tales: pineapple, eggplant, dates, raspberry tea, black licorice. Do them all if for no other reason than they’re delicious (save for the licorice, vom), and it feels good to do something proactive-seeming. Spicy foods is another one, but tread at your own peril here – you may pay for it later with heartburn- you know, because you’re preggers. Oh and here’s an activity: hop online and order some cotton, granny-style underwear — black, preferably — that you can wear with your maxi pads for a few weeks postpartum.

And finally, you may be fielding texts from friends and family — “Just wanted to see if you’re in labor yet! No pressure!” — but try not to get flustered by it. They’re excited and they mean well. (Also, that’s what the silent feature is for on your phone. Just in case you need to use it.)