The 4th of July has come and gone, summer’s officially, fully underway and… um… when does school start again?
First symptom of summer.
School's out. So many people live here.
— Mary (@AnniemuMary) June 1, 2017
But of course.
[every school morning]
Me: Get up.
Child: no
Me: Get up.
Child: I don’t wanna
Me: GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED[5:30 AM, first day of summer vacation]
Me: WHAT THE HELL
Child [clothed and eating breakfast]: wut— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) June 23, 2019
What is weekend?
Being a parent is waking up on a Friday and not realizing that it's Friday because Friday no longer means anything.
— Ｍｏｍｚｉｌｌａ (@milliondollrfam) June 14, 2019
At least there’s the beach. (Remember the beach?)
Let’s get married and have kids so instead of relaxing on the beach you can keep sand out of their mouth while I blow up a raft and they ask if there is a pool.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 18, 2019
It’s so worth it tho. You’re building memories.
[Day at the beach]
*Puts suits on kids, slathers them with sunscreen, makes sandwiches, packs cooler, packs beach bags, lugs 50 lbs or crap to beach, trudges over sand, lays out blanket, puts up umbrella, sets up beach chairs, *
6yo after 30 minutes: I wanna go back home
— SpacedMom (@copymama) June 24, 2019
The lazy days of summer mean there’s time for creative projects…
My kids’ summer bucket list:
Visit a museum
Go night swimming
Stare at your phone all day
Refer to your mom as Uber
Stab your sister with a pair of scissors— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) June 25, 2019
…and healthy, relaxed meals together.
SUMMER BREAK WEEK 1
Kid: Can I have a popsicle for breakfast?
Me: No, absolutely not.
SUMMER BREAK WEEK 2
Kid: Can I have a popsicle for breakfast?
Me: After you eat your real breakfast.
SUMMER BREAK WEEK 3
Kid: What’s for breakfast?
Me: Popsicles.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 5, 2019
Also simple nostalgic pleasures.
Family s’mores nights are all fun and games until the four year old gets a broken graham cracker.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) June 18, 2019
The sounds of nature can quiet the brain.
Having kids home on summer break is just yelling, “SHUT THE DOOR!” until you die.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) June 8, 2019
Great to see kids embrace nature…
5-year-old: Turn on the air conditioning.
Me: We're outside. There is no air conditioning.
5: So that's why people stay in.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) June 25, 2019
…and even learn to care for the earth.
wife: Why are there chicken nuggets all over the front yard?
me [whispers] Why are there chicken nuggets all over the front yard?
toddler [whispers] I planted chicken nugget trees
me: He planted chicken nugget trees— Josh (@iwearaonesie) June 23, 2019
Summer’s a fun time for parents to get creative.
googles "fun things to do with your kids"
skims results
googles "fun things to do with your kids if you're lazy"
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) June 25, 2019
Nothing better than time spent adventuring with family.
Co-parenting?
That's when you raise your kids with the help of Netflix, right?
Right?
— Jack's Dad (@DaddingAround) June 26, 2019
No homework means kids have a chance to pitch in a little more.
It's only 9:30am on Saturday, and I've already ruined my daughter's entire day by telling her that she has to hold a garbage bag open while her brother puts grass clippings into it.
Being a thief of joy is one of the perks of parenting.
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) June 1, 2019
It’s great to be alive in summer!
Day 2 of summer break: I can feel the aging process occurring in my body.
— Bunmi Laditan (@HonestToddler) June 26, 2019
