Ah, Thanksgiving. There’s the food prep, the house prep, the deeply crazy family dynamics. Then add to the mix YOUR KIDS and it’s… an experience. The funny parents of Twitter are on it.
I asked my husband to add some things that we needed for Thanksgiving to the shopping list. When I got to the store I realized he’d just written ‘Thanksgiving Stuff’ and if that doesn’t perfectly sum up marriage then I don’t know what does.
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) November 18, 2021
My youngest is 5 & I still have maternity pants saved for special occasions*
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) November 16, 2016
Listen, if you are going to someone's house for Thanksgiving, compliment their baseboards. That is what they are spending today cleaning.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) November 20, 2021
You have to admire husband's focus as he plays on his iPad while I furiously chop carrots tapping out "I hate you" in morse code w my knife.
— Val (@ValeeGrrl) November 26, 2015
Shoutout to everyone forcing their families to live on PB&Js all week because ALL THE FOOD IS FOR THANKSGIVING DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH IT
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) November 21, 2018
Make a "thankful tree" so you can burst a blood vessel waiting for your child to come up with something to write on a paper leaf.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) November 16, 2016
I love Thanksgiving. Can't wait to slave for hours over a meal my kids will rudely reject in front of relatives who are judging my parenting
— ally (@TragicAllyHere) November 16, 2016
serious thanksgiving question: when a family member's telling a tragic story and everyone's crying, how long should i wait before taking a bite of my pie?
— beth (@bourgeoisalien) November 22, 2017
6-year-old: Why do we have to have turkey at Thanksgiving?
Me: That's what the pilgrims ate.
6: I wish the pilgrims ate pizza.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) November 22, 2021
My desire for eating out for our Thanksgiving meal or at least using paper plates and paper cups intensifies with each passing year.
— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) November 26, 2019
dad: You're sitting at the kids table this Thanksgiving
dad: What's a carburetor?
dad: Who's SpongeBob's best friend?
me: Patri- oh
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) November 8, 2018
I wonder how long I’ll be at Thanksgiving dinner before my mom asks me to fix her computer.
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) November 25, 2019
My favorite thanksgiving tradition is going to the grocery store and avoiding eye contact with someone I went to elementary school with
— Dana Schwartz 🫀 (@DanaSchwartzzz) November 24, 2019
What is the age cap on leaving Thanksgiving early and blaming it on your kids needing a nap?
Asking for me.
— Amanda Marcotte | Mediocre Mommy (@storiesofamom) November 24, 2019
Let's get married & have kids so instead of enjoying Thanksgiving dinner you can make sure no food touches on her plate while I microwave him a hotdog.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) November 22, 2019
Me, before kids: This is dumb, we should get the whole week off.
Me, with kids in school: Do they really need the day after Thanksgiving off, too?
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) November 21, 2017
my favorite day is the day after thanksgiving, when I twitter search the words "hot cousin" and see all the people who have crushes on their cousins
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) November 15, 2019
Actual footage of me at the end of the day. pic.twitter.com/7rmMj1nWMa
— Moderately Mom (@moderately_mom) November 26, 2019