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How Not To Be A Mom Servant

I don’t think last weekend my butt hit the couch. I was constantly getting stuff for the kids, cleaning up after them. We all want to be supermoms, floating around and tending to their every need but that’s not really healthy for the kids or for us. I sat down with Sophia, mom of three, soon to be four, who’s an emotional intelligence expert.  She’s the creator of the Q Wunder app and here are some tips on how to raise independent kids:

Can They Get It Themselves?

  • If my kids ask me for something I ask myself, “Can they get it themselves” and if not, why not?” Sometimes your little one can’t reach the water, so you find yourself getting water all day long.  Instead, put it in a jug and put it down low somewhere within reach. They will be so happy because they’ll be able to help themselves. Same thing with cups, bowls, plates. I even put wipes down low because my kids actually like cleaning up messes when they can grab wipes.

Curb The Snack Addiction

  • Snacks are great, but the #1 question in my house is “can I have a snack?”  The funny thing is I get that question right after a meal. Here’s the solution: make sure your kids are eating big enough meals or just finishing what they have in front of them.  Be really clear and consistent about when meal times are and when snacktimes are. If you have multiple kids fix them all a snack at once.

Make Cleanup a Prerequisite

  • Aside from all the snack and drink requests in my house I always find myself cleaning up after my kids. Every time they ask for something ask them to clean up their messes.  You will be amazing at how efficient and fast they are at cleaning up when they’re motivated by something they want right at that moment.



Elle Walker is a co-founder at What's Up Moms and the mom to three kids (7, 4, 2). In her spare time, she loves testing out kids activities (often muttering, "Pinterest, you lie"), to find the best play that minimize set-up, reduce costs, and uses stuff up around the house.